i didn't get much sleep last night. i wish i were still sleeping.
i'm a lucky bitch. i got help. i don't deserve it. things are looking up a bit, although i still have no self control. i keep getting bailed out of trouble. i could never be a really good writer because things have been too easy.
q tip's voice is hot. itunes genius is kind of neat... i'm lazy and never feel like organizing my music, so i'm that person who has their ipod on shuffle and constantly skips over songs until i find something i wanna hear.
i wanna have people over. i wanna hop rocks. i wanna go to the country at night. i wanna pay for one movie and see them all. i wanna get out my aggression. i wanna hold hands with someone special. i wanna do something difficult and feel the reward. i wanna change minds. i wanna change the world, even in just some miniscule way, but i feel so overwhelmed and small. i want to feel that i'm not the only one. i wanna get in the car and drive with no particular destination. i wanna shoot the shit, doing absolutely nothing and feeling like options are endless.
i feel my window slowly closing. i'm on the outside looking in. usually i want it that way, but when i don't, it cuts me deep.
i have a hunger for adventure that keeps growing. with no satiation.
1 comment:
I can't encourage you enough to go adventure. Your window will never close but it will get a little smaller.
It's best to do them with someone else but not impossible or unrewarding to do it alone.
My regrets thus far have been that I spent too much time on a computer and not enough time changing the world, though I have seen several movies for the price of one.
Post a Comment